A Friendly Reminder: Be Kind

When I was scrolling through my Instagram feed, I came across a post from "Variety," that contained a photo of a Black man with a trimmed beard, wearing a white blazer and a black fedora hat. Near the bottom of the photo, the year range, "1982-2022" and his name, "Stephen 'Twitch' Boss" were written in white Arial font, separated by a long white line.

In the caption, it said, "Stephen 'Twitch' Boss, DJ and executive producer of 'The Ellen DeGeneres Show,' has died by suicide. He was 40.⁠"

The caption also contained a statement by Boss' wife, Allison Holker, which said, “It is with the heaviest of hearts that I have to share my husband Stephen has left us. Stephen lit up every room he stepped into. He valued family, friends and community above all else and leading with love and light was everything to him. He was the backbone of our family, the best husband and father, and an inspiration to his fans."

The caption concluded with, "Read more about his life and legacy at the link in our bio.⁠"

When I read about this, I frowned and shook my head. Questions flooded my brain. Why? What led him to do this? What was he going through? Why did he do this? And then it hit me. Just because someone is exuding positive energy, filling up the room with light and laughter, doesn't mean they never feel dejected, unhappy or vulnerable. Internally, someone could be battling a storm, but their facial expressions may never give anything away. Anyone can conceal every scar and wound, while going about their day as if nothing happened. At work, they could be giving their all, but at home, behind closed doors, they could be crying silent tears in bed.

Mental health is real. We all go through depression, pain and anxiety. No matter how happy any of us appears to be, each and every one of us can be fighting internal demons. Demons that no one knows about. Not our family members. Not our friends. No one.

So a friendly reminder: Be Kind. And don't judge! You don't know what someone is going through. You don't know their story. So don't assume!